Lessons Learned – Relationships over Things
By: Craig Peterson
Craig Peterson’s ChildrenI had the best of intentions. I never would have imagined my misstep – the precedent I was setting. After all, I was simply trying to be kind to my two newest sons.
They came to me after a decade of extreme neglect and severe abuse at the hands of their birthmother’s boyfriend. Both endured more than 20 out-of-home placements after being stuck in the revolving door of family reunification.
Lessons Learned – Entitled and Detached
By: Craig Peterson
Boys with GiftsSince my two sons hadn’t been diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder when they were adopted at nine and ten, I didn’t know to look for control.
What I did see was their sense of entitlement.
Lessons Learned — Less Chores, More Backgammon
by: Craig Peterson
My oldest son hated chores. Even the mention of the word set him off!
IMG_1235[1]No wonder. Before being adopted, he was regularly told to not only watch his five younger siblings but also clean the family apartment.
Although he tried – and he did try — his step-father was never pleased with his effort and used the opportunity to beat him before taking his anger out on my son’s mother.
Wearing a Mask
October 30, 2014 by: Kelly Killian As Halloween approaches and children begin to pick out costumes, they pick out a new “personality” to try on for a day. It makes […]
Lessons Learned – Understand Attachment Even Before the Placement Begins
By: Craig Peterson
Two Little BoysAlex and Travis are biological siblings. In 2001, they needed a home. One was nine and the other ten.
I wanted to help. I felt called.
Since I had done well with my first four children – all diagnosed with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, I thought these two would be easier to parent. Both were high functioning and personable.
Dr. Robert Anda: Childhood Adversity – the Nation’s Largest Public Health Crisis
September 30, 2014 by: Gari Lister So — wow! — ATN‘s Educating Traumatized Children Summit kicked off with some blockbuster interviews today! Throughout the Summit, the ATN Blog will bring […]
A Bigger, Better & Bolder Blog
By: Gari Lister
Welcome to ATN’s new and expanded blog! We have been working the last several months to plan a more active – and hopefully interactive – blog that will become a real resource for all of us fighting in the trenches to help our children heal from trauma and attachment issues. As ATN’s Blog Manager, I am proud to share in the exciting new initiatives of ATN.
Thanksgiving
By: Jane Samuel
‘Tis the season – for thanks giving that is. I see friends posting things they are thankful for each day on Facebook. There are probably similar lists on Twitter, Tumbler and Google+. I suspect my teens are being flooded with them on Instagram and my own email and snail mail is filling up with Thanksgiving letters from various non-profits, all worthy of a little monetary love AND thanks for their work making this a better world.
“Loss” – The “L” Word
By: Jane Samuel
Driving to school this morning my youngest (chronological age 11, emotional age – always open for debate) and I were discussing her father’s upcoming business trip to Asia. Pulling up to a stoplight, I glanced sideways and did a quick check of her demeanor. While she has gotten much better in the past few years about family members coming and going in her life, I still try to be on the lookout for signs that an upcoming loss – albeit a temporary one – might flip her internal emotional balance on its end. “Trigger her” as we say in the therapeutic parenting business.
Letting Go
by: Jane Samuel
She calls me from the spa-sleep-over-birthday-party and I am not surprised. There is a catch in her voice and she is asking me to bring money. I don’t question. I just get in the car and drive to her.