Wisdom from a Virtual Schooling Mom

Blog Manager’s Note: I don’t know about you, but I know that I have lost count of how many days we’ve been under orders to “shelter in place.” Although absolutely necessary, this isn’t easy, especially as more and more states make the decision to close school doors for the rest of this academic year. Thankfully, […]

Rupture and Repair: Emotions, Attunement, and Attachment

Stone heart with mini-action figures climbing on it - Rupture and Repair: Emotions, Attunement, and Attachment

“Why do some children become sad, withdrawn, insecure, or angry, whereas others become happy, curious, affectionate, and self-confident?” developmental psychologist Edward Tronick, Ph.D. asked in a 1989 paper called “Emotions and Emotional Communication in Infants.” The answer lies in large part with the quality of emotional communication, or attunement, between parent and child. We don’t get […]

My Son’s Brain in School

A brain, a globe, a clock - My Son's Brain in School

A neuropsychologist said of my oldest son: “His brain is not organized the way the world wants it to be, so he has problems functioning. But he doesn’t have behavior problems. His brain doesn’t do those.” My youngest son also has a brain that doesn’t fit the world he lives in, but his brain does […]

The Greatest Christmas Gift

Plate of sugar cookies in the shape of stars and candy canes

A few years ago, my parents flew out from Wisconsin to visit for Christmas. Because they only make it out to California to see us twice a year, and we make it to Wisconsin to visit them even less, it was a pretty big deal. Holidays were hard When we adopted our daughter through foster […]

ACEs and Toxic Stress: How We Can Heal Children’s Brains

Brain lit up in purple

As a trauma and emotion-centered psychotherapist, I am relieved that children are now being screened for toxic stress. Thinking about mental health as a byproduct of a child’s environment is an important addition to current thinking on how to improve children’s wellbeing. Rushing to diagnose a child with a potentially stigmatizing label, incorrectly blaming “defective” […]

Dear Educator, Part II

School Bus Emergency Door

Dear educator, In my first letter, I shared some things I didn’t know about kids with trauma. In this installment, I would like to share what some of what I have learned. Kids with trauma are just trying to survive Because his brain has been changed by trauma and he feels his very life might […]

What I Learned -or Remembered- when I Read Brave

BRAVE - book review

1) There are (at least) 2 kinds of being brave. One is an illusion in which we tell ourselves a version of events that we would like to be true. The other is the real deal. It involves facing our fears head on and living to tell the tale. In a future ATN blog post, […]

What Happens to the Siblings of a Special Needs Child

–by Sara Borgstede [read more from Sara, including the original version of this post, at her website The Holy Mess] When my teen son, young adult daughter and I return home from a youth group meeting, my heart sinks when I see a police cruiser sitting in our driveway. We walk into the living room […]

Lost at the Beauty Shop – A Story

Blue eye - Lost at the Beauty Shop – A Story

–by Anna Gosman, guest contributor All Karen had said was, “Walk around the corner and grab your iPad from the beauty shop. I’ll wait for you in the car.” Her daughter had forgotten her iPad, and Karen figured the thirteen-year-old could run back to the shop to get it. It was safe – this was […]

It’s Not Always Depression: An Emotional Education

–by Laura Dennis, with much gratitude to Hilary Jacobs Hendel, to whom I owe both the title and content of this post This is not a book review Last month, I wrote a post previewing Hilary Jacobs Hendel’s new book, It’s Not Always Depression: Working the Change Triangle to Listen to the Body, Discover Core […]